"One green bottle... sitting on the wall... hic... one greeeeen bottle... sitting on the wall... and if one... hic... greeeeen bottle should accidentally... oops..."
Kurt stumbled as he crossed his room towards the bathroom, inadvertently knocking over several of the empty beer bottles on his night stand.
It'd been a good couple of hours now since he'd arrived home and he'd already polished off 6 beers and the entire bag of chips. Now he was bored and wanted to dance.
Leaning against the frame of his shelving unit, Kurt unplugged his iPod, and by unplugged Kurt meant that he thumped random buttons until the sounds stopped coming out of the speakers.
'Ooh, chilli fries... I want chilli fries...'
Gripping the shelving for support, heedless of the CD cases cascading onto the floor in his wake, Kurt shuffled over to his vanity and to his cell.
Picking it up... and dropping it... Kurt fished it out of the tub of sour cream and licked the gizmo clean.
Grinning like a loon, Kurt flicked through his messages until he stopped on one from an unknown number.
'Who is unknown number? Do I know unknown number? Is he in math with me maybe?'
Deciding he'd investigate, he opened a drawer on his vanity and emptied the contents onto the floor beside him. Sinking down into the soft bundle, Kurt sifted through the assorted hats around him until he found his white deerstalker from when he was eight.
Stretching the fabric over his now far too big head, Kurt decided he now looked sufficiently like Sherlock Holmes to be able to do some first-class detecting.
Pressing the call button on his phone, he held it to his ear the wrong way up while the line clicked and then connected.
"Hello?" came the sleepy voice on the other end of the line.
"Is it me your looking for?" giggled Kurt before shushing himself.
"Kurt?" Noah's voice was concerned, "... have you been drinking?"
"Why yesh... I have Mr Unknown Number, did you know that from sharing my math class with me? My hat is making my head very warm so I'm not sure how much longer I can be talking to you."
"Kurt... what?" said an obviously sleep deprived and severely confused Noah.
"..." Instead of replying to the boy Kurt decided he'd rather blow raspberries... so he did.
"Kurt... where's your Dad?" he asked wondering what the best way to make him aware of his son's current condition was. It was so unlike Kurt to lose control of himself like this.
"Gone sleeping with fishes called Hanky Lester... he'll be back tomorrow." Kurt yawned and stretched.
"OK..." said Noah, resolve firming up.
"I'm coming over, don't leave the house."
"OK Mr Number Sir. The key is under the mate.. map... mat..."
With that Kurt pressed 'end call' and the cell screen went dark.
:D:D:D go Kurt
[x] fanfiction tuhoaa edelleen aivosolujani mutta mikäs siinä
yölliset mesekeskustelut med jack ♥ enkä toki oo väsyny ja hysteerinen enkä kuole tääl yhtään
muuten vaa oon chrishaperoissa eikumitä
CUTE CHIRS
Gerard innoissaan typonnu trolololol
siis tottakai Gerard, "gerardnmikeyrock" D44
paitsi ne pari häröä Twilight-videota siellä HUAH mitäollatämä
JA JA JA JA
KURTIN FRENCH DUB
0.30
:D:D:D:D:D:D:D MIKÄS SIINÄ
.........se Chrisin imitointi oli kyl paljon parempi JUST SAYING
............NIINPÄ KERTA CHRISIN DUBBAUSKI PWNAA NII TROLOLOLOL CHRIS ON PAREMPI
.............en haluu mennä nukkumaan mulla on liian hauskaa :D:D:D:D
// jack sanoo (2:34):
aaa oho kellokin raksuttaa
GEEKAT sanoo (2:34):
kui *ossum-hymiö*
GEEKAT sanoo (2:35):
eiku
*hoho-hymiö*
jack sanoo (2:35):
*hoho-hymiö* o
o
GEEKAT sanoo (2:35):
fail
jack sanoo (2:35):
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
ANTS
GEEKAT sanoo (2:35):
luin noit tuolt ylempää
ja siel oli mun et must tuntuu et poksahdan kohta
ja luulin et sä sanoit sen just
Como se dice "Mr. Schuester's fly is down" en Espanol? Kurt stared at the paper in shock, contemplating just ignoring it but before he knew it, his pencil was moving.
You actually showed up for more than the last fifteen minutes? Mr. Schue might actually weep for joy.
Hope he doesn't get too excited. I don't plan on paying that much attention.
What could you possibly be doing during school if you're not in class anyways? Hunting down Cheerios? Stealing virtue?
Puckzilla can't be caged in by the four corners of this shithole school. Obviously. Sometimes I just hang around the choir room with my guitar.
You do realize what a ridiculous nickname "Puckzilla" is, right? At least "Puck" has literary background.
The Puckinator has no idea what you're talking about... your face is ridiculous, so your argument is invalid.
It's literally like talking to a six year old when I'm talking to you.
Puckasaurous thinks you're being just a little dramatic, Hummbelina.
Children give themselves dinosaur nicknames. And don't call me that.
Why not? I kind of like it. You're very small and you know, a little girly. So it's pretty fitting. Me on the other hand... I'm fifty stories worth of terrifyingly delicious muscular dinosaur meat that can breathe fire. Godzilla kinda has a mohawk, too.
Thumbellina was a girl, moron. I am not.
Don't make me state the obvious. I know you're a dude, but you're the girliest dude I know. You know, in the least offensive way possible. We could go with Kurtella instead. Kinda like Nutella, so that would make you chocolatey and delicious on toast?
Can't I just keep my normal name? I don't need a dumb nickname.
You absolutely need a dumb nickname. What will you possibly do with out one? Even your black chick friend has one. Aretha, remember? Asian, other asian? I forgot what Sylvester called you. Gay kid? I'd rather just call you Hummbelina.
She calls me Kurt now, since I'm a cheerio. Well... that or Lady Face but I will castrate you if you call me that.
Like you could handle Puckzilla's might balls of titanium. I'd laugh at your feeble attempt.
Please. You think way too highly of yourself.
My balls are the only thing I've got going for me right now, so excuse me if I glorify them a bit. Well, my cock too. Cockzilla.
Super charming. No wonder so many girls let you into their pants. It's sad. No one believes in romance any more.
If you're looking to be wooed in this town, you're delusional. The most romantic thing I've seen all month is Brittany's budding relationship with the janitor.
It's sad, really. Most people's idea of romance is bringing a condom along.
Hey, that is romantic. I mean, it's considerate and all, right? And you're one to talk, you tried the whole... really weird and awkward thing with Brittany.
Ugh, don't remind me. Please. I've been trying to block the memory.
So you actually did make out with her, then? Did you touch her boobs? You didn't fuck her, did you? Because that would... really mess with my head.
Yes, no, and NO! Still... I don't know what I was thinking over the whole thing. Super stupid.
Kind of. But it's whatever, who hasn't tapped that at least once? I'm kind of impressed, Hummel. I wasn't sure if you were capable of talking guy.
May I remind you, yet again, I am in fact a guy. Not a girl with a short hair cut.
This is true. It's not like I don't know you're a dude and all, it's that you talk girl so much sometimes it's hard to imagine you talking guy. I mean come on, you're the one who tried to go over to the girl's team when we split up for mash ups.
That's because I knew none of you would listen to any of my genius ideas. Your loss, really.
I don't know, Kurt... I think you pulled off leather pretty well. You might want to try dressing like a guy more often. I mean... just not in flannel. That was weird.
And disgusting. Besides, almost all of the clothes I wear are boy clothes.
Dude. You wore a corset to school.
I said almost! And it looked awesome. It's not my fault no one here understands couture.
Uh-huh. Whatever you say, Hummel. There's no real point in arguing with you.
You're saying that because you don't know what it is, aren't you.
Yes. But also... you contradict yourself, you know? You say you're proud of who you are, that... being different is the best thing about you, and... I'd deny it to anyone who asks, but... you're right, Hummel. It's what's gonna get you out of this shit town. But then you also want to pretend that you're just another one of the guys... when you're not. You're not one of us, you're not some dumbass guy with a dirty jockstrap in his back pocket who didn't shower this morning because sleep seemed like a better idea. But who cares? You shouldn't care, because you're Kurt Hummel.
aw Puck ja Kurt olis kyl nii loisto pari ♥ pweese Ryan Murphy, make them happen ::::D
"Brit, what was it you said about Puck earlier?" Brittany, who was sitting on the floor, drawing designs on the carpet with her finger, looked up at Puck.
"That he was capital G gay... and so far in the closet he was in the garage." Puck gaped at her and Santana grinned.
"Right. Also, you have never dated a boy, Noah Puckerman. So you don't know if you do or do not date them. Stop being a pussy and admit your flaming, glittery feelings. I thought you were a stud ." Puck glared at her and really she'd at least pretend to be a little intimidated by it. But all in all, Puck had no words. Sure, he'd kind of fantasied about Hummel's ass or mouth while he jacked off and...okay... one time he watched some gay porn, but that didn't mean he was going all Adam Lambert.
[x] capital G gay
ja lololol "that didn't mean he was going all Adam Lambert" XD oliks ton siis niiku tarkotus olla loukkaus vai vaan toteamus or wut :D:D:D