IRC-Galleria

Toinen positiivinen ylläri johon tänään oon törmänny, on tällanen Manchesterilainen runoilija nimeltä Sophie Hannah. Erityisen hieno minusta, jostain syystä, on tämä.

Loss Adjuster

Scale down your expectations once again
From rest of life to years to one whole night
To will he wander past a phone or pen.
If he would only either ring or write.
Get real and scale those expectations down
From conversation to a single word.
Seen through the window of a shop in town
If not by you then by a trusted third
Party, or, if sighting is too much
To hope for, as undoubtedly it is,
Scale down your hopes and aim to see or touch
Someone whose name sounds similar to his.
A scale of one to ten. Two weeks ago
He dared to keep you waiting while he slept.
Scale down much further and today's poor show
Tomorrow you'll be happy to accept.

-Sophie Hannah, Love me Slender

Edittiä: Sama kirja (Love me Slender) ja kirjoittaja edelleen kyseessä. Löyty vaan toinen runo, joka on minusta aika mieletön. Spämmin siis:

LOVELY LESLEY LOST SIX STONE AND WON HER MAN
[headline from the Sun, 30 June 1993]

You have to be size ten to get a bloke.
You must be slim, petite and never podgy.
Since Stout is out you're left with Diet Coke
And other things that taste extremely dodgy.

You must be thin. Don't make me say it twice.
Size ten, or even twelve, but never fatter.
You may, in other ways, be very nice
But if you're overwrought it doesn't matter.

You have to shed pounds. It's such a drag.
You can't rely on brains or sense of humour.
It isn't true that many men will shag
Virtually anyone — that's just a rumour.

You need a model's figure, skin and bone,
Straight up and down without a single curve,
Unless you want to end up on your own,
Which frankly, would be just what you deserve.