I will begin with a famous quote:
"My name is Stephen Baldwin." - Stephen Baldwin
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
Nothing special about me Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
When I go to the clubs I wait in line Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
I got 600 dollars In the bank Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
And my sexual performances are average
I work at customer service for a phone company
I make 12 bucks an hour but that's all I need
I live in a small apartment on a quiet street
I don't go out too much I like to watch TV
I cant afford a car I use public transportation
I don't mind I read 'til I reach my destination
sometimes a newspaper, sometimes a book
the amount of money I save this shit is off the hook
And i am not very good with the women
I'm a pretty shy person and I'm average looking
last time I had sex was in 2003
and I am ashamed to admit but it wasn't free
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
I get nervous in social situations Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
I get constipated once a month Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
And i make pretty good spaghetti sauce Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
and I get scared when I go see the dentist
I'm the "Pauly Shore" of everyday life
easily forgettable and I am not very liked
I have an "According to Jim" personality
I'm as entertaining as a fucking STD
if you wanna mess with me I think you probably can
because I am not confident and i am weak for a man
I'll just roll up in a ball while you kick me in the back, yeah
honestly I probably wont fight back
And I don't have many friends that would back me up
My friend Steve would but he doesn't look very tough
Steve: "You want some of this bitch?"
If you rarely get laid put your hands up
If you're not well paid put your hands up
If you got a pet cat put your hands up
and if you got a bad back put your hands up
Jon: "I hurt my back two summers ago moving a fridge and ever since then it's just not the same... you know it... it gets... It gets pretty sore"
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
My parents are really nice people Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
I am somewhat afraid of heights Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
I like the show "Greys Anatomy" Mother Fucka
I am just a regular everyday normal guy...
and I am pretty good at making paper planes